Our call sheets for day six-- a Tuesday-- listed the weather as "Smoky". Twenty miles away, wildfires were raging through suburbia. Somewhere a mother of four was standing in a street, silently holding her children, watching her last hope for an easy life billow, drift and curl up into the ashy sky.
When I arrived on set, people were lighting up cancer sticks and commiserating about the air quality.
In Los Angeles, self-absorption is the drug of choice. But instead of funneling through back alleys and creeping out of seedy apartment buildings, it's sold on billboards and television screens. You deserve this... you need that. You aren't cool if you don't talk like him, wear those jeans, watch this show, look like her. But don't worry, because you probably do. You're part of an elite. You live in L.A. after all.
Self-absorption is the only drug for which the most helpless addicts are rich, famous, and powerful. If you aren't high on self it's tough to succeed in this town-- because the junkies have the keys to the city.
So when I spend time on set with Hollywood pros... getting coffee, bringing people water, picking up dog shit, pointing fans, fetching jackets and feeding parking meters... it's tough to feel like I fit in. I'm just Iggy, after all. Nothing altogether special or deserving about me. I'm doing work that I should be doing, with no experience, and I can't get too full of myself about that.
But every day I spend with Key PA is a day to gain his trust and move up the ladder to handle bigger, better tasks.
After the end of day five, we were all on edge hoping that we'd be allowed to film inside the house that day. Luckily for us, our enterprising locations producer had gone to Ralph's and bought a large "gift basket" for the family who owned the house. I think it was the gift basket that did the trick. It didn't work for Michael and Dwight, but somehow it worked for us: we were in.
To be honest, not much interesting happened on day six. It was the first day of work for our (arguably) most famous cast member, a stand-up comedienne who did "vulgar" way before Sarah Silverman made it awful. I got a picture with her on my cell phone camera. Right after I did, Key PA called a full production-assistant huddle.
"Guys... no pictures with the cast. For the love of God. Are we tourists?"
Then we all had a good laugh at Flood's expense.
But I spent the rest of the day nailing everything else I was told to do. I helped corral cast members into the house for their scene (which was filmed entirely in Korean) without being asked, and got big thanks from not only Key PA but our first assistant director as well. (The 1st AD is my boss's boss's boss. Score.)
Stand-up Girl's scene involved lots of ritual dancing, loud drumbeats, and a baby. I read the script for this movie, by the way, and I'm still not really sure why some of these scenes exist. It's a pretty weird story. I almost want to say that, but the truth is it's actually a super conventional story with weird trappings.
After that scene I had to leave for practice, so my day six came to a short, but sweet end.
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